More Waiting

This time last year:
The pills they had insterted in me the night before did nothing, though I was having some contractions (pretty hefty ones), but they were sporadic at best.  They used some more pills that morning and hooked me up to the pitocin.  This was a boring day.  Full of walking through the contractions to try to get Eli lower, laying in bed hooked up to drugs, many many needle pokes since my veins were not being cooperative, a little sleep, Eli moving around like crazy.  TONS of visitors.  Being hooked up to fetal monitors.  Checks, checks, and more checks with very little progress.  Coming up on the 24 hour mark I was really starting to get frustrated.  I had dilated to maybe 2 cetimeters and had effaced very little, Eli was NOT even close to being in position to birth.  The contractions I was having were definitely strong and painful and long, but not close together at all.  My pitocin continued to be upped until nightfall where they unhooked me to give my body a chance to do it's thing.  That night I was having horrible contractions and they were able to give me some pain meds to help, so at least I got a few hours of sleep.  It had been a very long day.

This day this year:
The anticipation of Eli's first birthday is kind of making me an emotional wreck.  So many ups and downs in the past year, so much to take in, so much has changed in our lives.  And even with the bad times, I can't trade them because they are part of my life with my baby, and they have shaped who he is and who I am, and who Aron is right now.  This is how we got here.  There are so many memories, I'm sure I've forgotten a lot, but the ones I have kept stored, either in my mind or in pictures and videos, make me so happy to have what I have now.  I love my little family.  They have made me happier than I have ever been in my life.